That was a long day....

I'm tired because I never really got much sleep last night. I'm not sure why. We went to bed quite late anyhow, and then I tossed and turned all night. I dreamt that I was working a job in which I had to scrub dead, mutilated fish which were as long as my arm span and with killer needle teeth. It was my only job, and I was being threatened with the sack; a blessing and a curse, really, given my dream selfs situation.

We were awoken by our intercom going off. At first, as it jolted me from my disturbed sleep, I thought it was the courrier bringing the lovely new clothes I ordered on Tuesday, but as I stumbled sleepy eyed down the hallway to answer I caught a glimpse of the clock in the living room and realised it was only quarter to seven in the morning. I picked up the reciever, but no one answered my greeting, so I went to look out of the living room window to see if I could catch our cold caller.

Right outside of the flat was parked a police car, but not just parked up at the side of the pavement; it was right accross the road, blocking it off from oncoming traffic. A police officer was walking down the street, away from our flat, scribbling in her little notebook. I wondered if there had been a "domestic" as they are not infrequent around here, but as I took in the sights from down the road I saw more police cars cordoning off the other end of our block.

Ben had joined me and this point, and suggested we go back to bed for now, we'd soon find out what was what, and if it was an emergency they'd surely be more persistant at our door. This time I fell straight into a deep and blessedly dreamless sleep, to be woken again at half nine by Ben coming through to give me the news about what was going on in our street. According to the local radio, a fifty year old man had been beaten about the head with an iron bar in a brutal assault in the early hours of the morning, litterally a few metres away from our flat. He was alive (and I've heard no news since to the contrary) but in hospital. I got up and started my morning routine. It didn't take long before the police were back to ask if we'd heard anything. We hadn't of course, our bedroom is on the other side of the building.

When we finally got out we were two hours later than planned thanks to our prolonged lie in. We knew we'd be out and about in town today, going for a meal and going to see Conan the Barbarian at the cinema. We also needed to sort some things out at the bank. As it turned out, the bank took much longer than we initially expected, however we did what we needed to do and then went to investigate the times for the cinema.

Given our lateness (you can ask my friends, I'm only ever punctual for work!) we weren't going to be able to enjoy our meal in a relaxed fashion and get to the cinema on time too, so we decided to opt for Apollo 18 instead, which we'd both read about and were very much interested. Plans reshuffled, we headed for Jamies Italian for a much looked forward to feast.

We'd been before, back in February, and thoroughly enjoyed it. However we'd not had any starters, and so this time we decided to go the whole damn hog. We went for a meat plank to start, though I have to say that as delicious as it was, it was a little dissapointing on the size department for the money we paid...there was one sample of each thing (one Lombardi chilli, one piece of prosciutto, one piece of salami etc) so we carefully divided each bit up. Then, because I'm now on Weight Watchers properly and counting all my points properly (as opposed to last week when I signed up then got distracted by familial meals out again...) I ordered a Prosciutto and Pear Salad...which was most definitely not tiny and was absoloutely divine.

Sadly the dessert didn't live up to expectations. Knowing I was trying to stick to being good I'd checked out the menu beforehand and decided to go for a sorbet. However, I noticed they had a dish that involved super thin slices of pineapple with mint chilli and blood orange sorbet, and remembered that fruit is all free to gorge upon on Weight Watchers, so I decided to try it. It was...unusual. I suppose the mint chilli should have been a clue. Anyway, it just wasn't to my taste, I kinda wish I'd just gone for regular old sorbet...however, since I had been very good all day I decided to be a little naughty and leave half of it then get a Ben and Jerry's at the cinema later (which was most definitely to my liking!)

If one thing put me off the whole thing, it was our waiter. Don't get me wrong, he was indeed a lovely guy, but he was so....involved...to start with, I asked for what was essentially a sweet sherry to drink. I knew they provided table water, and I generally only have one drink with a meal (I'm a very slow drinker, in fact I probably don't get enough fluid in general because of this). He twisted his face however;

"Really? You know, that's really supposed to be a dessert wine...."

"Oh, I know," I replied, "but I love this, and I really really just fancy it"

"Really?"

"Yeah, I love it!"

"Well....if you're absoloutely sure....are you sure?"

At this point I kind of lost my temper a little bit. I don't drink a lot of alcohol. I tend to have a drink with my meal if we're out and about, and if we arrange to have a few hours in the pub every couple of months with our friends then sure I'll have more than just one....and then there's the once a year or so when I go a bit bonkers on a night out...but seriously, when I drink I'm drinking because I want to drink something specific. I wasn't in the mood for 'actual' wine. His face was a picture when I turned around and said;

"Oh ok then, just get me a diet coke then".

Not the response he was looking for I feel.

He felt similarily involved with our starter. After explaining what every individual piece of garnishing was he finally left us to it, however when he returned to find everything gone but the mega olive (neither me nor Ben like olives) he pointed at it like my mum would if she'd found I hadn't eaten all my meal. After arguing with me over it I eventually picked it up and took a bite out of it.

"There, you see?" he said.

"Mmm...it's really not to my taste".

I'm going to stop reviewing our meal time now before I burst into an even more violent rant about it.

After lunch, we still had an hour or so to go before the film, so we decided to go to Waterstones and browse the books.

I had in mind a book I wanted to get after having stumbling accross it on this blog belonging to one of Ben's old University mates, called "The Ultimate PCOS Handbook". Having read her overview of it, it appealed to me; like Nicki, I've been poo pooed off by various doctors who don't seem to appreciate the difficulties it causes, and when sent to see a dietician about it, she just infuriated me (as I've previously discussed) with her inane suggestions and no talk of how best to treat my condition. Anyhow, I've never actually read a book about the condition, and all my knowlege is based around the symptoms, supposed causes, and "if you loose weight it goes away, but the condition makes loosing weight a shitter" so I decided hmm, can't hurt. Plus it'll keep my mind focussed on the reason I want to loose weight; to make babies.

After our impromptu shopping trip to Waterstones we perused HMV then made our way to the cinema where, to our joyous suprise, we ran into Becky and her lovely lover Steve. They'd come from work as an impromptu thing so I convinced them to join us for Apollo 18 thinking it'd be great. I now feel nothing but horrifying guilt.

Dont get me wrong, Ben absoloutely loved it. And it consisted of a lot of the things I love in a good horror; great tension, bare little glimpses of what it is that is terrorising the victims, great jump spots...and I loved Paranormal Activity and Cloverfield...but this just didn't do it for me. Once you realised what was happening (which didn't take long) the mystery had vanished and all you were left with was some tension built on the promise of having a jump. It really didn't deliver it well, however.

It was filmed to look and sound like grainy old footage from the early seventies, and this kinda helped to give it suspense because you couldn't really see what was happening...sadly this method made for such a distorted hour and a half of visual and audio that by the end I had a splitting headache and was dizzy for at least an hour afterwards, as well as motion sickness (and as I said, I loved Para and Clover, so it's not like this has happened before with this kind of "amateur footage" film). I also found the "monsters" behind it all to be pretty mediocre. I mean, the film is marketed on the basis of "this is why we never went back to the moon" but all it really says is "we never went back to the moon because the moon has crabs" - or should I say rocks that turn into crabs. I know there's nothing much on the moon other than rocks, but really...crabs? Your evil alien overlords that burry into your body and drive you slowly insane are crabs?

I really didn't enjoy it, and I could feel from her body language that Becky wasn't enjoying it either. I feel kind of bad for dragging them into it now, especially since we had to go to do the shopping pretty much straight afterwards...but never mind. You win some and you loose some. Like I said, Ben thought it was great so perhaps you will too.

Anyhow, that pretty much sums up our day...we did the grocery shopping, then when we got home my mum called and we had a nice long natter. Me and Charlotte are going to see The Queen of Spades in Leeds at the end of October so I was explaining some of the arrangements to mum since we'll have to stay there overnight (Charlie and I did consider just hopping a late coach back to Liverpool after, but the show ends half an hour before the last coach and we didn't want to risk it.) I'm really looking forward to it, and of course I'll be able to scratch off "go to see another Opera" from my day zero list!

Appologies for being so verbose with not even a single picture! I just had such a lovely day, and now I have to head bedwards as it's a work day tomorrow. Till later everyone!

The last of the Potters pt. 2

Well, this was never meant to be a two parter, but since it's my first entry since actually seeing the film (and as today has been such a wonderful, relaxing day which seems to have gone by far too fast and really nothing much at all has gone on to blog about) it may as well be.

It was absoloutely magnificent. I said to Becky before we went in that I'd probably shed a few tears by the end of it. I was one of the few people who wasn't actually crying at the end as it turns out, but not because it didn't touch me...merely because my powers of holding back the tears in order to maintain my eyeliner so I don't have to bus home with streaky cheeks is phenomenal. It was quite a tear jerker, for a number of reasons;

1. The end is so happy! Yes, they include the epilogue, and you know, it's always weepy to see a new, happy generation spawned from the loins of your good friends. Not that Harry Potter is a good friend, but you know...the children! Awww...
2. Everyone dies. And whilst the deaths aren't the same as Dobby's death when he dies there right before your eyes, it's still terrible and sad.
3. Although I maintain it isn't the same kind of "end of an era" thing as when the book came out, there certainly aren't any more Harry Potter films left. All I have now is Twilight, and that just isn't the same...

There's really not that much to say. If you've read the books, you'll know how close to the story the films have always kept and this was no different. If you haven't read them, well you'll certainly not want me spoiling it any more than I already have. I watched Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone this afternoon when it was shown on ITV and it's amazing how much the effects etc have come along. It was very shiny, full of action.

Oh yes, once again, if you've actually read the books you'll already be expecting a much more action packed spectacle than part one, and if you haven't, then don't let the last films more dull sequences bore you. Part two hits the ground running, then doesn't stop till the end.

No film is perfect of course, but I find it hard to think of anything majorly poor, all things considered. I suppose Bellatrix's death was a little underwhelming, though amusing (if death ever can be funny) death by ulta tight corsetry. Voldemort's death too was a bit underwhelming...not the death itself, but the duel at the end just...well it just wasn't how I pictured it in my head. I can't fault the film for not being able to read my mind. Once again, because of the solid and dedicated fan base the directors had a hard job on their hands when it came to bringing such an epic scene to the screen.

All in all I can't wait to see it again when my folks come down...and if they decide they don't want to see it...then I can't wait to watch all eight films back to back :D

Till later folks,

L.A. Noire; a first impressions review from a not very serious gamer

First off, thanks for all the positive comments regarding curry, I shall endeavour to share the final recipe and results with you next Saturday!

I spent a good portion of yesterday afternoon (when I wasn't looking for curry recipe's lol) playing L.A. Noire. I've not spent half as much time on it as Mister Ben has, and in a way it's to my detriment...many of the story lines I'm passing through I already know from overhearing it as he played it out, and as such it's felt like a bit of a slog as I scamper to catch up somewhat into the part where I decided to take a bath/do some knitting and was too engrossed to pay much attention to the tv so that there'd be new stuff.

I know it's probably not at all in best practise to review something I haven't finished yet but now I'm finally playing it off of my own steam it doesn't seem like a bad place to tell of my first impressions.

I'm not a huge gamer, and when I do play anything that doesn't involve lording it over pretendy peoples lives like a pixel overlord (or overlady?) or building businesses or cities, it's usually the kind where I can run up to dragons and promptly bop them over the head with a sword. I can't shoot for toffee, and often end up dead and twitching on the ground before I've even had the chance to level up. I don't like shooty games because I can't do them. In fact I believe my brother heard me swear for the first time in his life (at least to my knowlege!) the first and only time we played Left for Dead together. I'm just not good at such games.

So L.A. Noire appealed to me. I understood of course there would be some action...I may not like out and out shoot-em-up's but come on, a cop game without guns? That would be too much, even for me. But the overall theme was more sedate, its big selling point being that it involves questioning eyewitnesses and using your intuition to read their facial expressions to tell whether or not they are being entirely honest with you.

When I first read this, I was intrigued. What I imagined was a game with a scope similar to that of Mass Effect or Dragon Age, with a story line which, depending on your correct or incorrect interpretation of the evidence and interviews, could go various different paths. It seemed a logical conclusion, in my head. If a detective in real life fails to get all the evidence, a suspect walks free, and there are possible consequences. I imagined a great show down at the end where everyone was in on a great conspiracy in which you have to do battle against each and every one of the suspects you failed to prosecute succesfully.

Well, obviously I'm not at the end yet! However, the reality of the games storyline is far from what I imagined.

Don't get all the evidence? Misinterpret your witnesses body language? That's ok, because your boss sends you back in to interrogate them until you get a confession. At the end, the only real consequence is your score, with cases given up to five star ratings.

If you are a points and achievements collector then this is all very well, but in reality it makes the whole game very linear, when the possibilities of this new technology of which it boasts mean it could be so much more interesting.

Of course, other Rock Star games have pretty linear storylines too, so I shouldn't really have expected anything else, but the monotony is broken up somewhat in games like GTA and Red Dead Redemption by the open world. So far there isn't very much of that in L.A. Noire, though I understand that once the main storyline is complete there's more chance to drive around LA and "collect" any small side cases that you've yet to complete. But it's not quite the same as being able to pull up to town and randomly engage with a passer by who mayhap has a mission for you.

Perhaps because of this very linear game play, which I'll admit is probably a fault only because of my own personal taste in gaming (which, as explained before, isn't exactly wide in its range or sophisticated at all) what L.A. Noire provides, essentially, is a series of crime episodes, as if played out as a series on TV, in which you are basically the driver. You will not loose, however frustrating having to go back to re interview your suspects may ultimately be, but you may well not experience the entire story if you do not, for example, pick up all of the clues.

I can't deny I'm a little dissapointed. It isn't what I expected, but perhaps I should have read up on it more or read more reviews. Aside from my own niggles and annoyances, the storyline itself isn't bad at all, and I am chomping at the bit to see more of that. Perhaps by the end of it all I'll feel a little less frustrated and will have enjoyed taking part in the story.

But even if I do want to go back and pick up more achievements by the time I've finished, I can't see that I'll get any joy at all from replaying it.

Eurovision 2011: Bex's highly informed opinions of it.

I'm not the hugest fan of the usual cheese that Eurovision peddles, but I can't help myself but love it. The light hearted family fun feel of it never ceases to perk me up. Sure, I can only handle it once a year and I never bother keeping up with the run ups, but that once a year I await with the greatest of anticipation. This year, held in Dusseldorf, Germany, wasn't quite as breathtaking or eyecatching in its stunts or acts as former years, although that might well be the cynicism of my age creeping up on me more than anything else. At any rate, I enjoyed it no less than other years and am already planning for a Eurovision fancy dress party next year!

The night kicked off in style with a rockabillyesque version of "Satellite" by last years winner, Lena, who was back to represent Germany again this year. This was followed by the first entry, Finland, who I'm sad to say wasn't quite as sparkly as the opening act.

Don't get me wrong, it was a nice enough little song, certainly better than some of what was to follow. The singer was so sweet you could wrap him up and sell him as toffee. Or pack him up as a doll, Ken's little brother or perhaps Action Man's weedy secretary. Either way I'm afraid Finald, who ultimately came 21 out of 25 was a bit of a shrinking violet and so far removed from their jaw dropping winning entry from 2006 (Who would be Lordi, as if you would forget that!). He just got all washed out by the rest of the glitz, glam and spectacle of Eurovision.

The show picked up with the second song however, an entry by the typically eccentric Bosnia & Herzegovina. Their show piece this time round? A random, trumpet wielding hobo (though I don't recall him actually putting the trumpet to his lips...if anyone recalls this do let me know!) who could well have been Ali G dragged up from a ditch after a week long bender who seemed to, well...run around and leap elegantly from one end of the stage to another like a...graceful Bosnian deer...

Ahem.

Denmark continued in a happy bouncy but unremarkable fasion, and Lithuania was fourth on stage, and was the first country to showcase what I like to call the "Eurodiva". The Eurodiva, if you have never watched Eurovision, appears every year. Her song is heartfelt and soulful. Towards the end she begins to scream somewhat. She is clothed in what is supposed to be an elegant gown and usually appears on stage on her own or with an instrumentalist or a troupe of crazy dancers of some description. In typically elegant Eurodiva style, Lithuania appeared with a grand piano. There were various Eurodiva's tonight, and there was nothing specifically special about Lithuania's diva except that she happened to be the first on stage.

Fifth was Hungary, who at first had the potential to be the second Eurodiva but her song was much too cheesetastic pop and her blue lame dress much too short to be classy. Perhaps Eurotramp would be the best way to desribe Hungary's offering, and the rest of Europe seemed to agree...she came 22nd in the end, even lower than Finland's pretty wallflower boy.

Sixth I had more of an interest in because sith on stage was Ireland, represented by Jedward. Now, it's us in the United Kingdom who are really responsible for Jedward. It was us (well I say us, it wasn't me personally I must press you to understand) who launched them to fame via the X Factor. They already have a relatively impressive (I suppose) fan base here in the UK and were always going to recieve our 12 points. Their performance was typically flamboyant. They wore matching sparkly red suits with the most humongous foam shoulder pads that made them look very tense and stiff throughout their eccentric dance routine which mostly involved them jumping up and down like a pair of angry leprechauns...and I'm not even being racist towards the Irish when I say this...their costumes paired with their trademark hair do and random leaping up and down (I don't know whether or not it was actually intended but this dancing and leaping up and down was not in sync with one another, or with the music) made them look like a pair of angry creatures from fairy land. Rumplestiltskin comes to mind, actually. As for the song itself, I have to admit it's now stuck in my head, but I don't recall actually hearing them singing it. The backing singers were very good though! A memorable performance, certainly, however.

Seventh onto the stage was Sweden, who looked at one point like they were going to win it (alas, they did not). The song was another catchy one, about being popular. Not my particular cup of tea, and the performance which involved him standing at one point in a glass cube (no idea why but this is Eurovision at the end of the day, why do any of them do anything?). This entry was the male opposite of the Eurodiva; the Eurohunk. Nice looking fella strapping around on stage and giving you the eye through the camera. Once again, he was not the only Eurohunk on stage this evening, but probably the most memorable.

Next came Estonia's entry, one Getter Jaani, whose bone structure and overuse of makeup and tan made her look about thirty dressing to be thirteen in a hot pink baby doll dress the likes of which wouldn't go amiss in the lolita fashion stores of Japan. As a matter of fact, she's 18 years old and is a prime example of why you should stay out of the sun to prevent premature ageing, and why sometimes less is more when it comes to makeup. Still the song (which is what we really watch Eurovision for, right?) was pretty decent, catchy Euro-stock.

Greece was next. Oh dear sweet Jesus. What gets me is that this song ended up coming seventh place (proving the Eurovision political voting machine is still as healthy as ever) despite being absoloutely dreadful. It was slow and dirge like. The rapper...well..couldnt rap...and the singer was sub par. I seem to recall Greece using this same formula of Eurohunk singing what is supposed to be an epic, soul stirring anthem in previous years, and being shit then as well, but this year was by far the shittest. Come on Greece, let's see some actual talent next year.

Greece was followed by Russia who won using the formula at which Greece fails miserably a couple of years ago, but if I can be honest I can't remember anything about their entry. I may well have been cooking my pizza at this point, which tells you all you need to know about it. They were followed by France, who were tipped by bookies to be the favourite to win (followed by Jedward). The song was certainly not your usual cheesy pop and was rather operatic in sound. Still despite the pretty boy with his pretty hair blasting his lungs out best he could there was something not quite right about it, something a little bit off as if he was slightly out of tune or out of time with the backing track...I can't put my finger on it...still after the hype of hearing that France was gunning to win this year, I was sorely dissapointed.

Italy on the other hand was very much a delightful song. I've never heard jazz sung in Italian before. If you were to ask me, I'd say France's entry should have been Italian and Italy's entry should have been French. Either way, a definite thumbs up from me and Ben here, we were toe tapping all the way through except on a couple of notes where he felt the need to immitate nails on a chalk board using his vocal chords. I'm glad I'm not his vocal chords tonight.

They were followed by Switzerland, another Eurodiva type act whose song would have won me over had it not been for the fact that whoever had written her song for her had run out of words half way through and just filled the space with "Na na na na na na na na na na na". After Switzerland came our entry, good old UK. Sadly I havent much to say on them because the band has been around since I was in school and were as bland and boring then as they were tonight. It came as a huge suprise to me when they were briefly leading on the score boards, but apparently they're known to a few of our European neighbours.

Then came Moldova, and my first thought upon seeing them was "GARDEN GNOMES!". Their particular brand of Eurovision was as wacky and fun as you expect, and they were even joined halfway by a Garden Fairy on a Unicycle. As for the music, it was upbeat and cheery. Ben describes it as "Gnome Ska" although to my ears any ska influence was only slight. Either way, I loved it!

Germany was up after Moldova with a repeat performance by their winning songstress from last year, Lena. This song was not quite as cheerful and toe-tapping as Satellite and I think she may have hired giant silver sperm people to be her dancers, but it was ok. It was average, despite Ben jumping up saying "I would" as soon as she came on stage. I don't know....

Germany was followed by more "average" and unremarkable acts from Romania, Austria, Azerbaijan and Slovenia. I don't really recall the Slovenian entry but Romania was of the Eurohunk Band variety, Austria was a Eurodiva and Azerbaijan was a Eurodiva/Eurohunk ballad. Iceland followed with another bland but nice song. There was a touching story behind it which endeared me to it even more; it was originally written by a fellow who, of course, intended to enter it for Eurovision but before he could perform it for Iceland's selection people he went and popped his clogs. A band of his friends got together and played it on his behalf just so it would be heard and Iceland decided after all that they should go on to represent them which I think is lovely. I don't know what kind of a guy this person was, whether he was a dick or a saintly sort but I hope wherever his soul resides now he's got a little smile.

After Iceland came Spain who have historically done very poorly. They ended up coming 23rd but I thought this particular act was worth much more than that. Spain was followed by Ukraine, another Eurodiva with another generic Eurodiva song, but she was accompanied by a sand artist...if you didn't watch it it's hard to describe but basically instead of a pre reorded animation baking the singer, the sand artist made pictures with sandon a back lit work bench on the stage and a camera feed of this hooked up to the screen behind...it was certainly different and very endearing! But like I said...generic song was generic.

The last two acts were worth the wait, but I think by this point people were getting tired and the audience wrestless and as such they didn't get half the pop they should have. The penultimate was Serbia with a real 60's feel pop tune (and by sixties feel I mean the clothes, hair, makeup and set were done up like this too!) which once again I personally would have given a higher place than the 14th place that it got. The final was Georgia who was a bit of  a Linkin Park/Evanescence cross. This appealed to the teenager in me, and I think I'm probably the only person other than her who actually really liked her dress...Ben also liked it, but I think that's more because it wasn't heesy pop. He's still a bit of a musical elitist underneath it all (Which he will no doubt adamantly deny but hey :p)

While the votes were counted and verified, Dusseldorf really let itself down. Usually at this point in the show, there is some kind of stage act. This has been circus and acrobatic type acts or massively choreographed dance troupes. Yes there have been music acts, but always accompanying the visual spectacle. This time it was all about the singer. I couldn't tell you anything about him, and his backing dancers were pretty generic. It could have come straight out of the contest itself and was a bit of a let down (I always anticipate this part of the show!)

Anyhow the results were then called in. As usual, for some reason some presenters feel the need to hog a bit of limelight. Poland's presenter demanded people "guess" who they gave their 12 points to and there was an awkwards silence for about 10 seconds or so before the German presenter insisted she hand it over or so. However, the point giving was still rather exciting because unlike recent years, there was no clear run away leader, and for a little while the UK was top of the leader board!

In the end it wasn't to be for our bland performance. Azerbaijan won (to a comment from Graham Norton that they are one of the countries who can actually afford to host it, still being relatively oil rich...ouch...) despite there equally forgettable contribution. I suppose the rest of Europe disagreed with me. We voted for Moldova (for the Gnome tastic performance) who came 12th, Georgia (because Ben wanted to) who came 9th and Iceland (because their dead man story endeared them to me) who came 20th.

Our bland Blue boys ended up 11th all together, which is a massive improvement on our recent positions, whilst our pointy haired Irish cousins came 8th. France, hotly tipped to be number one came 15th (I sure hope he didn't listen to all the hype that had surrounded him up till that point) and last years winners pipped the UK by only one place, comming 10th.

So that was the Eurovision Song Contest of 2011 anyhow if you didn't see it yourself, and I just can't wait till next years!