My current relationship...
I'm happily married to possibly the most wonderful man I know.
But Bex, I hear you cry, your last post was a vitriolic hate filled rant about how he's crushed your dreams and can't make a decision if his life depends on it!
Look, here's the thing. I may be young...but that doesn't mean I'm naive to the troubles and tribulations that will inevitably affect anyone venturing into a long term serious relationship. What really peeves me I think is when people talk to me as if I'm clueless about the challenges a marriage can bring, but also disrespect the fact that we are married...Before our wedding, people seemed to have awe and respect for the strength and conviction of our relationship and love we felt (and still feel!). Once we got married, this turned into a tirade of jokes, challenges to our fidelity. People have, infront of me, made jokes about friends of mine being "Ben's bit on the side". They've made accusations that because he happened to finish work at the same time as a female colleague that they must be having an affair. Colleagues have also made jokes to Ben about doing 'unspeakable' things to me in order to wind him up. This never happened before we were married...why did it start happening after? Just before we were married we should have seen the signs I suppose...the last day I worked before I got married a colleague turned around as he flounced out of the door and said, "And remember Beka, 50% of marriage ends in divorce!"
I wonder why that could be? Could it be that people expect their marriages to be sunshine, lollypops and rainbows from the off and then forever after? My parents have never been married to anyone else, and growing up I saw them with their fair share of arguments, same with my parents in law. Anyone who watches thus far succesful relationships and really grow to understand them can tell you that it's not all a bed of roses. Marriage is no different to this. The important thing is to go in able to compromise and understand each other, then you won't end up as a divorce statistic.
I see my friends and I'll have a moan and a complain about Ben, and I've no doubt he moans and complains about me. I don't see this as unhealthy at all, I see this as a totally normal, natural way of dealing with the strains and stresses of daily life. But I think too many people would see this as something of a problem.
Nope, not at all. We moan and we complain and we sometimes (though not often, suprisingly enough) argue, but we also understand each other, support each other, and most of all we love each other very much.
Anyway, I leave you with pictures of the man I love :D
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| You have entered...the outer limits... |
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| He can indeed be a colourful character |
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| A few months after we started dating, at a fancy dress pub crawl! |
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| My favourite of our wedding photos ^_^ |
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